June 25, 2008

Yesterday was a really good day 🙂 In summary:

1) I met Patty & Lulu for lunch at Cova, this new patisserie at Paragon 🙂 We shared a nice ham & cheese panini, a vegetariano panini and a tartufo cake for dessert. We talked about what has changed since we left, how things have changed, progressed, fears, hopes… we talked of friends past and new. It was nice!

2) I got offered a temp job at Frost & Sullivan!

3) I was asked to work on a songwriting project that will come up in August. I am thinking of taking up the role of Logistics I/C for the project… but still in the midst of consideration!

4) Got an invite to Mambo tonight… I was wondering when exactly to go because everyone seems so busy.

5) Got another invite to MOS on Thursday… but I’ll see. I’m not sure if I can deal with all of this at once!

On the whole I must say I am very happy to be back 🙂 I like to think that everything else is peripheral; and it does not take much to convince me when I’m occupied… yet when I am not they come back to me. Yet this has taught me a whole new lesson on what it means to trust in Him 100%, that He will reveal all things in His time, that ultimately one’s actions and words tell the thoughts of the mind and the true feelings of the heart. I am slowly but surely becoming more contented, satisfied and confident in my place in Jesus… with everything I have. Which is a whole damn a lot of stuff!

I am starting to remember the talents and skills He has blessed me with, the hordes of friends I have, that all around me I have wonderful people who love me and care for me… I feel so blessed with my lot in life. Not everything is perfect, but I am contented. I am happy. After yesterday I really saw… that even people I haven’t spoken to in years care for me. We were taking a walk at 10pm and suddenly someone from a cafe shouted at us and came rushing by and said, “I know Mel just came back!” And I was shocked… but it made me see how silly I was to think that maybe in some people’s lives I have diminished in presence just because we barely communicate. Here was someone I have barely spoken to in all our years of friendship, yet this same person took the simple initiative to add me on facebook, to say hi, to give a smile, to even notice that I just came home! I am so, so thankful for all the people that have stayed up with me into the nights in the past few days, who have been (relentlessly) calling to ask “How are you? Can we meet for dinner? lunch? tea? coffee?” How silly I was to think that so much has changed since 9-10 months ago that people would forget about me, or busy their lives with other things. Yes, things change and people have changed but it is the greatest blessing to see that inspite of these changes they still treasure the relationships we share! How proud & wrong was I to think that I was the only one who bothered.

Relationships all take effort. They take commitment. And for all of that to fall in place it takes maturity. What makes it so hard is that these levels have to be matched by the two friends/parties involved. Love can be a happy thing, a great thing… but it can also be sad, and awful at times… but it is beautiful because it teaches us responsibility. Teaches us about choice. And it teaches us about putting other people before ourselves, it opens our eyes to see what kind of character/personality we ourselves possess. If in a relationship only one party is willing to put in the effort… if one party is only happy to be in a relationship if he/she feels the friendship or feels the feeling of “love” towards the other, it definitely needs reevaluation. And even when everything like that seems to fall in place, you need the grace of God to sustain it. It is more powerful that anyone can imagine… I’ve seen it in so many instances in my life and others I can’t deny its importance!

Ahh.. I have been rambling on. Butttt I AM SO GLAD TO BE HOME! Singapore is awesome 😛